Remembering Wesley John Paul Yocom

Wesley Yocom Memorial  

An Unfinished Life

Born: December 12, 1978 – Calgary, Alberta  

Died: Friday, January 28, 2022 – Vancouver, British Columbia 

Age: 43 years

Wesley was the son of Mary Mullally Yocom of Calgary (formerly of Montreal) and the late Paul Yocom (formerly of Toronto).   He was the twin brother of Natalie Yocom Burdziuk of Calgary.   He is survived by his immediate family which includes his nephew, Daxton and his twin nieces, Evelina Anne and Charlize Rose Burdziuk of Calgary.   Wes was enduringly and deeply loved by his late maternal grandmother, Mary Mosend Mullally; his aunt Maureen Mullally and his uncle Wayne Godfrey of Montreal.   He will always be remembered. 

Wes had a stunning intellect.   He was a gifted man.   In the last years of his life, he chose to pursue a law career and he was graduated from the Peter Allard School of Law at the University of British Colombia on May 25, 2022, posthumously.   The Law School Admission Test (LSAT) is a tightly timed, extremely difficult test designed to assess critical reasoning, reading comprehension and persuasive writing - skills most needed for success in law school. Wes obtained a perfect score on the Law School Admission test – a rare accomplishment managed by an elite few. He wore his intellectual talent with grace and discreet humility while simultaneously sharing his intelligence generously.  For many years, he instructed candidates in their preparations for LSAT examinations. He volunteered with Vancouver Legal Aid.  He was sensitive to the needs of the Indigenous Peoples of BC.  He cared about others; he helped people.  He was a kind, gentle man and a gentleman.   Wes gave.

At UBC, he was a member of the Green College Players (a Greenie!) - a theatrical group which offers an annual play that is acted, directed, produced and designed by members of Green College.    April of 2018 saw him perform in Green College’s annual play titled “Something in the Living Room”.    Wes’ social conscience, his concern for other people and his sense of moral justice were factors in his decision to act in this play that dealt with problems of race, homophobia and sexism.    The play triggered enlightening discussions between the performers and the audience about these issues.  All the proceeds from the play went to the Insite Supervised Injection Facility in Vancouver’s Downtown Eastside.    Wes gave.

Wesley loved words.    One of our favourite memories is going with him to the Westmount Library in Quebec and touring him through the stacks.    He used to play a favourite word game with his maternal grandmother.    They enjoyed each other’s company and both shared an interest in the formation of English language words and their origins.    His grandmother admired Wes and respected his choice of a legal career.    She supported his academic pursuits on many levels with the most meaningful being words of praise and encouragement when he would call to let us know how he was doing in law school.    We gave Wes listening time.    He gave us something to crow about and rejoice over.    It was a challenge for him to take on law school in his late thirties.    He met this academic challenge with commitment and zeal as he was awarded an abundance of A’s and B’s in his law courses.    We were so proud of Wesley. We are and will always be proud of him.     We are deeply thankful that we had him in our lives. We will be forever grateful for all that he was and for all that he achieved during his short stay.    Wes gave.

Wesley was a Canadian National Scrabble Championship (CNSC) player.   He competed in the Western Canadian Scrabble Championships from 2012-2020 in Calgary, Edmonton and Vancouver.    He handled the mathematics of the game effortlessly.    Many of the players against whom Wes competed in tournaments praised his finesse and refinement.    With a sparkling smile, he effortlessly drew others into his presence even in win-lose competitions.   

Wesley visited Montreal where he indulged enthusiastically in Montreal Smoked Meat.    He learned to sail in The Thousand Islands of Lake Ontario with his aunt Maureen, uncle Wayne and his Golden Retriever dog cousin, Guinness; he travelled to the Maritimes as a young boy with his late aunt Anne and her companion, the late John Reid.    There, he climbed sand dunes, built enormous sand castles and explored the beaches of eastern Prince Edward Island.    He curiously and hungrily walked along the sea shores inspecting sea offerings - clam, lobster and scallop shells, driftwood, flora and fauna, the ways of seagulls and piping plovers.    It was fascinating to be with him.    His mind was always in motion.  He was affectionate, charming, a delight to be around.  He was loving and lovable, interested and interesting.  His smile was wide, warm, welcoming; his spirit - generous, humble, giving. 

Funds have been set aside in Wesley's memory for the benefit of his twin nieces - Evelina and Charlize Burdziuk. When they reach eighteen years of age the accumulated monies in the Uncle Wesley Memorial Fund will be released to them.

2023

To Wesley, our Wesley 

So little time. 

So much to learn. 

So much undone and left to do. 

You have “Crossed The Bar”. 

“The woods are lovely, dark and deep,”

And you have no further promises to keep.

You lost your life to find it again. 

You are free.

You are soaring with stars that shine as brightly as you did when you were with us.

AND… 

You are having the last word in Scrabble.

2024

Ilicet  by Theodosia Garrison

We think the gentle soul of him

Goes softly in some garden place.

With the old smile time may not dim,

Upon his face.

He who was lover of the Spring. 

With love that never quite forgets, 

Surely sees roses blooming

And violets.

Now that his day of toil is through,

We love to think he sits at ease

With some old volume that he knew

Upon his knees.

Watching, perhaps with quiet eyes,

The white clouds' drifting argosy;

Or twilight opening flower-wise

On land and sea.

Those whom he loved aforetime, still, 

We doubt not, bear him company;

Yea, even laughter yet may thrill

Where he may be.

A thought, a fancy - who may tell?

Yet we who ever pray it so,

Feel through our tears, that all is well.

And this we know - 

That God is gentle to his guest, 

And, therefore, may we gladly say,

"Surely the things he loved the best

Are his today."

2025

     Wesley - The Measure of a Man

Not - “How did he die?” But - “How did he live?”

Not - “What did he gain?” But - “What did he give?” 

     These are the units to measure the worth

     Of a man as a man, regardless of birth.

Not - “What was his station?” But - “Had he a heart?”

And - How did he play his God-given part?

     Was he ever ready with a word of good cheer,

     To bring back a smile, to banish a tear?”

Not - “What was his church?”   Nor - “What was his creed?”

But - “Had he befriended those really in need?”

Not - ”What did the piece in the newspaper say?”

But - ”How many were sorry when he passed away?”

We would like to acknowledge and thank those of you who have visited Wes' Memorial.  To date, January 28, 2025, 450 of you have come here to remember him for awhile.